YouTube’s New Program is Horrible


Welcome back guys, to another episode of “YouTube Just Fucked Us In The Ass And We All Just Need To Love It” (insert scribble noise here) Hey, what’s up guys, it’s Scarce here So you guys may have heard about this new program that YouTube unveiled yesterday called “YouTube Heroes.” I don’t know why they made it sound like a shitty… like a Dance Dance Revolution game, but I assure you it’s far less fun than that. For those of you who have no idea at all what I’m talking about, there’s an option on YouTube for users to flag a video for being ”inappropriate”. And as a result of that, you can get your video demonetized by having it age-restricted so you can’t make money on it, or just removed completely, and getting a ”community strike” on your channel. Three of which, and your channel gets erased. So, basically, that has been a long-standing problem in the YouTube community of people abusing those flags. And there’s been even groups of people, like, hundreds of people who will come together and be like “Hey, I don’t like this guy, let’s fuck ’em up and all collectively flag his videos,” and then YouTube, as kind of a response to a “red alert” will just remove or age-restrict their video without really looking into it, and a lot of times… incorrectly. And the way they present it in the video is it seems like something out of “A Brave New World,” it’s like something out of Communist Russia like “Hey, spy on your neighbor, guys!” *snaps* Let’s watch this video. [Music plays] “BECOME A HERO….LEVEL ONE!” (Clapping) Oh, you guys are became- you can.. become a hero! Who are they, who are they even appealing to? Fuckin’ eight-year olds? “You guys can come– become a hero by reporting videos that you disagree with on YouTube!” [Music plays] Okay so, we’ve got:
Level one, become a hero and join YouTube, God Bless. You’re a hero now, buddy! Step two, learn more. Okay, watch a couple videos? and then step three: unlock super tools! [Music plays] Mass flag videos! Just like this guy is doing here! Check it out, guys! Wow, you’re a hero, dude! Did you see he– just– one guy alone shut down this guy’s YouTube channel. Fuck yeah, dude. This is definitely what YouTube needs to bring the community together and not completely ruin it. This is probably the most haunting feature of this whole program. Why would anybody need that? I mean, “mass flagging”! They’re just… begging people to abuse this shit. They are masochists. Well, anyway, this is why I’m making this video. Essentially because every time YouTube comes out with such a stupid idea I feel like we’re obligated to just say, “Hey YouTube, I love ya buddy.” –He’s like, this friend who’s like constantly drunk but you love him because you grew up with him and you’re like: “I know you’re a good guy somewhere deep down inside because I remember when we were friends we used to have a great time. And I’m not gonna give up on you. But you’re always drunk! You’re always starting shit! You’re a menace to be around, I can’t stand you! But I remember the good times, and so I’m always gonna be here to try to help you, guide you to… to being well again.” So I feel like YouTube’s my best friend that I can’t stand but I still love, and I– it’s just our obligation here to kinda take– to not let our friends drive drunk. So, that’s kind of the purpose of this video, here today. Listen, you gotta pay people, that way they’re impartial, they’re competent. Okay? You can’t recruit Social Justice Warriors, childrens, and troll to moderate YouTube for you. You need to pay people, that way they’re impartial and they’ll actually do a good job. Okay? Thank you. YouTube, have a seat just have some water dude. Have some water, puke it out, okay, you’ll be- we’ll get some pancakes in the morning, it’s gonna be fine. We’ll just move on to your ne- to the- ’til next weekend when this inevitably happens again. [Music plays] So this is what I love. They’ve got different steps here where they reward them for essentially working them- for them for free, for longer. So you’ve got step three, you can mass report. Step four, you get to try new products. Step five, you actually get to be a full time unpaid employee of Google. Uh, step six, you get to sit in the CEO’s chair and basically oversee all the operations of the whole company forty weeks per year. It’s a really cool opportunity– it’s unpaid, by the way, so… and then step seven, your consciousness is uploaded into the cloud where you will live eternally as the “YouTube God”. So, there’s some interesting incentives once you get a little higher up in the program. I mean, YouTube’s been getting a lot of shit lately… A lot of complaining, a lot of hesitation, uh, and I know they’re doing their best to try to, you know, make it work. But, this does not make sense! I don’t understand where you guys are coming from with this one here. But, if you are paying employees to come up with these ideas, then, I mean, psh, I don’t know maybe unpaid employees is the way to go, I don’t know. Somebody got paid to think of this idea, and that to me is possibly more troubling. And it got– and this got greenlit! “Can we get the greenlight on the YouTube Heroes program? Yeah, we’re gonna ruin everything for everybody. Dope! Let’s set that up.” “Everybody’s gonna love this program!” Cut to the thumbs up – the like/dis ratio. That’s a creator’s dream, right there. That is every creator’s dream to get a like ratio like that, pffbt. Well. That is a real dream. Also worth pointing out as one final point of irony is that YouTube disabled the comments on this video. Which kind of proves my point. These people commenting on your video that are so annoying you had to fucking censor them and disable the comments, are the same people you’re recruiting, to flag my videos! Like, do you not see the fucking irony? You disabled the comments! These are the same people! We don’t want these people! I li- That being said, the program also rewards people who do closed captioning, and subtitles, and I will say these people ARE actually fucking fantastic, brilliant heroes, and I love the idea of rewarding these people who… who take ACTUAL time out of their day to make the community better. That is just a selfless act of kindness. And I love and appreciate the people who take the time to do that. {Thanks Ethan!} But to put these actual heroes, who do subtitles and closed captioning, on the same pedestal as someone who just fucking clicks a report button cause they’re angry, is insane. So YouTube, I guess in closing, I’ll see you next weekend, same time, same place. You’re gonna be fuckin’ trashed. There’s a great happy hour around the corner, it’s with a shot for one dollar, you’re gonna get way too drunk, I’m gonna end up taking care of you and you’re gonna tell me you hate me, okay? You’re gonna’ tell me all these terrible things– but I love you. Because you are my friend. And I remember the good days. And I know there’s a good person in there and I will always love you. Thanks for watching, guys. ‘Preciate ya.

100 thoughts on “YouTube’s New Program is Horrible”

  1. This is what Justin Y. Does, he spams report on all tags that have inapporitate words. Just like the like button on his comments

  2. Does anyone think that YouTube has gotten slowly worse since google purchased it?
    I like google as a company, but it is getting sad.

  3. I'm gonna make a video that's just 12 hours of nothing, flag it for nudity, and make those bastards sit through the whole thing

  4. bruh ik im late but since i know this now i can trash jake paul and joey salads channel the worst youtubers on youtube

  5. not like your drunk friend, more like some guy you trusted that fucks you up the ass when you get passed out drunk

  6. When you have captions on and Ethan is talking about how great those people are, the subtitle writer wrote “ {Thanks Ethan}”

  7. YouTube boss in meeting: attention everyone a have a idea. How about we make YouTubers work for us by sniching and reporting what they dont like and destroy YouTube some more?. Everyone: agrees. Boss: and we should name it YouTube heros.

  8. "Mommy, can I be a superhero when I grow up? "
    "Sure son, as long as you work hard and make sure you fuck up the videos and channels of you tubers! Now run along, I need to make sure Hugh Mungus goes to jail."

  9. What the FUCK. YouTube actually advertised mass flagging, the most commonly abused way of attacking people on the platform, as a feature? 🤯

  10. It’s been 2 years, here we are in the vox adpocalypse. Demonetization is everywhere. SJWs and enraged teens who don’t know their own gender are running rampant…. *country roads begins to play*…. *all countries simultaneously fire their nuclear missiles*… “guess we’re hitting the reset button.”

  11. My YT channel was actually growing pretty steadily for a while. I had reached 2900 subs when, in 1 night, I had 3 videos flaggedand my channel deleted. Because my channel was so small, YT didn't care at all because they could afford to lose me. I ran an atheist/skeptic YT channel and I focused a good amount on Islam. I think the community guideline I violeted was the one about challenging ideas.

  12. Probably a bunch of church kids that get off searching for videos that they can flag as an excuse to watch bad videos their parents wouldnt want them watching

  13. Gain Social Credit by reporting your neighbours for political dissent! upbeat music Unlock new tools! Tank starts rolling towards guy in Tienanmen square + upbeat music

  14. Why the fuck doesn't youtube get people like ethan to consult on issues? idk they've got some serious bradberrys in that organisation.

  15. Everyone’s about to ORDER66 these YouTube channels. Let’s make a petition to remove this YouTube program!!!

  16. shiiiit… ive been reading you subtitles and theyre definitely a boost of funny,,, as soon as i have some extra dough im supporting all the h3h3 work

  17. So emblematic of today’s culture. Showing an animation of someone mass flagging vids to censor and pass hate onto content without even watching

  18. the problem is you have to keep loving him even tho he fucks you in the ass. after all you get your paycheck form youtube and i understand that but still it's inacceptable how youtube treats the people who care about it the most/youtube benefits the most from(aka. channels like yours). have you heared of the youtubers reunion thingy joergsprave(slingshotchannel) started ? it looks like a big goof to me but he might actually go as far as he can with that and sure some support would help.

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