Facebook Dating (Parody)

Here at Facebook, we’re all about making connections, which is why we created Facebook Dating in the first place. Our complex algorithm uses your personal network
to find you the perfect mate. When I first met Zoya, it was like she already
knew me. On our first date, we stayed up all night
talking about my mother’s maiden name, my social security number, even the name of the
street I grew up on as a kid. It was incredible. My name? My name Zoya Millovich Petrovich… Jones. I come from Boston and I’m a very big fan
of the American baseball squadron, Red Sock. Go Red Sock. Facebook Dating is the completely secure,
private way to meet that special someone. Hey babe, have you seen my keys? They’re right here, along with your tax returns
and voting history. Aw, thanks! If you have Facebook, you already have Facebook
Dating. You didn’t ask for it, we didn’t ask if you
wanted it, but we’re gonna give it to you anyways. And we already have access to all of your
information. So what do you have to lose? Sign up today.

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